Sunday, February 19, 2006

Supa Sore...

Supa is under the fantastic delusion that since she spent most of her childhood intensely training as a gymnast and dancer, that despite now being damn near middle aged thirty something, she can still bust out in a back handspring or side arial or any otherwise flashy athletic move that showcases her above average physical condition anywhere and anytime she wishes.

Well. This is the exact same delusion which led her to believe that she could simply bounce into her new beginner's level yoga class and gracefully execute required moves without even stretching or warming up nare a muscle. Which led Supa to do pretty okay in class on Saturday morning, but subsequently left her suffering from some sort of severe muscular paralysis syndrome come nightfall.

Supa only became aware of her affliction when at 2 am she went to go potty, and realized that she had lost any productive use of her arms and legs which would faciliate any walking or moving motion.

Supa then whimpered pitifully in her newfound parapalegic state, praying that she wouldn't be forced to call RR#1 on his cell phone, so he could come downstairs and carry his brokedown rickety ass mother to the bathroom. Supa knew that if she forced his participation in this instance, that once grown, he would use this scenario as the main reason for him needing years & years of intense therapy....

So. Supa has spent most of the weekend doped up on Tylenol PM and soaking in epsom salt baths (REFUSE to do the Bengay!!), while hissing and moaning and proclaiming "lawd jesus" while walking around with the swiftness of your average crippled 94 year old. Which, don't misunderstand - didn't keep her from hobbling off to Ikea's President's day sale today - but it did cause the checkout boy to gather that Supa was making a pass, seeing as how she moaned and smiled at him upon reaching for her wallet. Because "pain sounds" kinda mimic....good sex sounds, ya know. Ummm. Yeah.

Oh, and Supa's friends are having a fucking ball with this one, trust and believe.

Thank goodness tomorrow's a holiday...Happy weekend, blogger fam!

Supa, *moaning, groaning, hissing* out!

14 comments:

Miss Ahmad said...

OMG I wonder if you went to the same yoga class I did a few weeks ago. I had to take a mexican muscle relaxer after class number two..but you know what the worse part is? i'm going back for me...

Sangindiva said...

Why do I know this feeling OH so well?
I have not taken my ass back to class for
just this reason... But as I laughed-ahem-
WITH you... I also have made the decison to
go back. See, some good came out of your
pain and you didn't even know. Well, now
you do but you know what I mean!!
hahaha-see I'm laughing WITH you... :)

Supa said...

@ Ms. Ahmad - Sis, ya should've warned me!!! :) Can u mail me some of that muscle relaxant???!!!

@ Sangin Diva - oh see, you're really a diva, if you're up posting from JAPAN!!! I know you're laughing at me, it's okay. All in sistahood, right :)

Sexy Petite Diva said...

Very Good Supa! I'm very proud of you. I worked out this morning. It was a struggle but i worked through it! love ya!

Phone Date this week?

The Sarccastik Variable Why said...

yoga huh...i'm thinking about taking it....sounds intense (maybe i might try something else)...good post

Supa said...

@ Sexy Petite Diva - It's a date.

@ Sarccastik - Yoga IS intense, and it's quite a workout. Don't be fooled...

Single Ma said...

LMAO - I bet you were in there tryna show off your gymnast skillz. HA HA HA

I tried a yoga class once and I left feelin like a senior citizen. I neva did go back (lol). But I bought a beginner's tape. Lawd have mercy, that was worse! I'd rather do Taebo than subject myself to yoga again. I figured yoga wasn't made for big bone-ded people. LMAO

Ja said...

Oh so you're a little raggedy muffin over there today huh. You'll be alright.

I practice Hatha Yoga and it is definitely all about the stretching, but then that applies to most physical activities. I aspire to move into Kundalini Yoga as a means of reaching a higher creative level.

Let me know when you master the Bridge Pose and the Dophin Plank Pose. So far the handstand is the one I'm not even going near. I have carpal tunnel and that effects my wrist strength. A sister wants to be in shape and limber but that's no good with a flipping broken neck.

onecoolhoney said...

Aww dayum...po' lil' thang! :(

*really wondering if Supa and CoolSis are more telepathetically connected than was originally thought*

Cocoa Girl said...

Girl, you betta recognize...Yoga ain't for the weak! I too learned the hard way!

African girl, American world said...

LMBAO @ the whole RR#1 scenario....therapy for life gurl, all it takes is that one thing :)

Hope you're better.

Epsilonicus said...

I was just crusing through. I have to say I like your blog. I understand how you feel!! I had a boxing match this past Friday and I am still sore!!. Hot showers and baths work wonders!!

"N" Search of Ecstasy said...

Gotz 2 be mo' careful!!!

LOL @ mimicking the 'good sex sounds'.

At least you didn't have to go suffer at work today like me ;-(

Anonymous said...

I know the aches and pains of over doing it, the epsom salts works but why I don't know. I understand the "NOT" bengay that smells too much like....
get a good massage. That always does the trick for me. A bad back is nothing to fool with.

Feel better!